Thursday, October 22, 2009

Overheard in the Newsroom

I have been swamped at work lately and it's killing me.
But in honor of my busyness here at the newsroom, I thought I would give you taste of what it's like to work here, through quotes.
You see, we have some weird-ass people who work here and often I will hear the strangest things. I always compile them into a notebook.

I thought I would share a few of them with you. Enjoy!

(A fellow reporter talking on the phone)

Reporter: "Hey mayor! How have you been lately? It was great seeing you and your mom at that party last weekend!"
(pause)
Reporter: "That was your wife?!"


(My editor talking to his boss, our publisher, about his favorite film)

Editor: "There's the scene at the end where the sun is setting and she's standing there in her white dress. She knows he's not going to marry her. It's heart breaking. It's one of the only movies where I've actually cried."
Publisher: "It sounds like an amazing film."
Editor: "God yes. It's definitely the best Muppets movies ever made."


(Editor to reporter)

"Get off your lazy ass and sit there like you're supposed to!"


(Our most famous sports columnist, who is also the highest paid employee at my newspaper)

"My biggest sacrifice in life is not being rich."

and

"I don't need to serve in the Army or even be in the Navy. I serve my country by being a great journalist."

(Um, this guy makes close to one million dollars per year just by writing one column per week about sports.)


(Reporters talking to each other)

Reporter 1: "It's a terrible thing when you have to see your father naked."
Reporter 2: "I think it's good for a boy to see his father naked sometimes."


(My editor to the entire newsroom during a meeting)

"If we are going to be hookers, then let's be hookers at a high price...not a $40 trick."


(My editor on a voicemail to my desk phone, which was left at 4 a.m.)

"I growed up on a tree and now it's falled on me. Shit."
(click)


And I literally have hundreds more quotes. I think I need to write a book. Haha.

I hope everyone is having a wonderfully amazing week!

56 comments:

  1. At first I thought that you made up the crazy stuff that you heard in the office. Now I have learned there is no way that you could have made any of them up. There are too many instances and they happen so often. Must be fun, your boss is the best character ever. He is quite the character.

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  2. LOL Those are so awesome. I loved them. You should definitely write a book. I think these are great. They definitely put a smile on my face.

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  3. This is hysterical...please do write a book. Lol...I can just imagine some of the stuff that happens or gets said there...


    Thanks for the chuckle :)

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  4. Hysterical!!! I think miss piggy and kermit make me cry too. Love this post. Thank you for sharing. xoxo

    SC

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  5. LMAO!!! The muppets one is my fave! All though the naked dad one is pretty great too.

    lululetty.blogspot.com

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  6. These are funny quotes and all-original too. You have to compile them. Thanks for a good morning laugh!

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  7. HAHAH Just fell off my chair from laughing so hard ... OMG I love these!!

    xoxo
    Amy
    thebargainhunterextraordinaire.blogspot.com

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  8. these are hilarious-it's good that you can find the humor:) I am starting to lose that ability at my PR job xx

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  9. hey thx for ur comment. yer, the cardigan is super comfy, i m wearing it most of the time here in hk during winter :)

    the blabbers

    halolalaland.blogspot.com

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  10. Hahaha this is so funny! :D Thanks for sharing...
    You definitely should put them in a book, that would be awesome!
    Have a lovely day!
    xoxo
    Giovanna
    www.bohomarket.blogspot.com

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  11. That would be a great book. I laughed so hard at some of these!!

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  12. Jennifer-- this stuff needs to be incorporated into a pitch for a TV series. I love it. You really couldn't make up quotes this good, though, could you? :)

    xx

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  13. HAHAHA i love "My biggest sacrifice in life is not being rich."

    that's my sacrifice too.actually I CHOOSE to not be rich and to be worldly and a rounded person... HA

    hope all the hectic at work dies down soon! I hope that's my case as well, take care :)

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  14. Holy Crap. These are hilarious. :) They just made my day. Cheers. :)

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  15. Loooool, these are hilarious! Reading them definitely made my day. I can't even choose my favourite!

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  16. haha!! these are priceless!! brilliant!! made me laugh even with a throat infection!! :)
    magpie-girl.blogspot.com xx

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  17. You really should write a book! These people are crazy! And hilarious!

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  18. You should totally write a book, darling!

    The first one is hysterical!!

    xoxox,
    CC

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  19. Wow that's unreal, no wonder you question your sanity when you're around these people. ( : My fav was the Muppets

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  20. Ha ha, thanks for a good laugh! I hope your week is going well too!

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  21. Awesome! At least your entertained...ain't nothing funny going on in my windowless corner of Corporate America. Any brilliant quotes about working with a psycho bitch? I'm all ears!!

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  22. LOL, these are sooo funny! You should definitely share MORE of these to us! What a laugh!

    And please give that 1M/yr sports journalist a big smack on the head for me! ;)

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  23. These are hilarious! I needed that! :-)

    http://idlefascination.blogspot.com/

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  24. My god.. I work in magazine publishing but I just encouter naked models and lots of overpriced bags. sound like you have more fun!!

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  25. haha! those are awesome quotes. you should definitely write a book lol

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  26. ahaha that's so funny ! i never think those comedy stuffs on the office happened only in TV . now i know it's not true . haha . thanks for sharing dear ! please do write more :) oh have a nice weekend !

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  27. Ha these are hysterical, and yes, you do need to write a book!! Happy Friday!

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  28. Honestly, I really do think you need to write a book. I practically fell out of my chair laughing about these - though the first one truly takes the cake..."That was your wife?" :)

    The things that come out of people's mouths - post more please; I need some entertainment! :)

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  29. Hahaha! Nice post! These actually remind me of the Overheard in New York/at the office/at the beach/everywhere websites. People submit random bits of conversations they overheard. Funny stuff!

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  30. Thanks for the laugh, hun! The hooker quote might be my favorite...

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  31. these are HILARIOUS!! Ahahaha. Your place sounds like an awesome place to work. I think you SHOULD write a book!

    Amber

    ambersmouthwash

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  32. A book would be such an awesome idea! Sounds like your office is nuts - and I'd have to punch that silly rich guy...

    http://dreamingspiresandoldcartyres.blogspot.com

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  33. LMAO alot of those made me laugh .... haha the things that come out of peoples mouths

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  34. LOL! It seems like a whole lot of fun working at your office.

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  35. LOL!! JENNIFER!! these are HILARIOUS!!! :)

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  36. the first comment actually cracked me up. those are awesome.
    xo

    http://ahautemess.blogspot.com

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  37. Oh my goodness, J. That last one nearly killed me. What is he on??? I want some. haha.

    The Muppets??? Seriously??? Dude, that's not right.

    You must write a book - I keep telling you to!

    And yes, you are completely evil to wish S and I took that 5 1/2 hr. trek. The stupid GPS thing wouldn't let us change the functions as we drove so I had to take it down and turn off the satellite to reset it.

    I missed you and your blog sooo much!
    Have a great weekend, hon!

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  38. haha, hilarious! love the muppets one.

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  39. hahahah!! those are hilarious :) what newspaper/magazine do you work/write for?
    xx
    neutraltuesday.blogspot.com

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  40. I would DIE if you wrote a book with those quotes

    They're awesome!!!

    Loving, loving your blog

    Hahahah @:
    "God yes. It's definitely the best Muppets movies ever made."

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  41. OMG those are hysterical.

    I almost want to steal those quotes for my everyday life to make people laugh around me.

    Or at me, as the case may be.

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  42. HAHAHAHA. I love these. Especially the naked father things, reminds me of an incident when I was younger. Which I will not speak more about.. HAHA. I love eavesdropping - ahem - overhearing, as I always hear the funniest things!

    Thanks so much for stopping by!
    girlwiththebowtie.blogspot.com

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  43. Too funny! Hope you have a whimsical weekend! And thank you for making GirlWhimsy one of your blog stops, today.
    http://girlwhimsu.blogspot.com

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  44. hahahah it sounds like something right out of "The Office". you guys need your own reality show! journalists are so much fun haha.

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  45. ha i love this! thanks for your sweet comment x

    Missy
    For all things fashion:
    http://thefashionfusion.blogspot.com

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  46. HAHAHAHA
    you have such a funny workplace

    please include lots of these more often! SO funny

    thanks for the sweet comment on my blog :)

    myglitteringcreation.blogspot.com

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  47. Wow, eavesdropping is awlays interesting :D

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  48. lol, these are too funny ! and thanks for your amazing comment :)

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  49. I wanted to let you know that I've given you an award on my Sugar & Spice blog. Hope you've been enjoying the weekend. Cheers!

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  50. Ha ha! The first one is really unfortunate. How do you even recover from that! I miss working in a newsroom sometimes...

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  51. That quote about the Muppets movie made me laugh out loud at MY work. Great quote collection. I like to collect them too. My favorite so far? "Well, just keep your ear to the grindstone."

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