Saturday, June 12, 2010

Confessions of a (former?) shopaholic



When I was a newspaper reporter living at home two years ago, I didn't have to pay for anything. No rent. No car insurance. No bills. My goal was to save up my entire paycheck to buy a new car.

Unfortunately, I am a shopaholic. I know it sounds cute, but I truly think that this is a legitimate disorder. In the course of one year I spent every single penny of my paycheck. I literally spent thousands of dollars on clothes, jewelry, handbags, shoes, and food.

Now that I am unemployed and living on my own, I regret most of my decisions. My car is tick-tocking away and I have absolutely no money to buy a new one. I have no money for anything.

I screwed myself.

This post is dedicated to some of the purchases I regret making.

The brown and gold St. John suit I only wore once.

The Ralph Lauren sandals that hurt my feet.

The $200 dinner at the Argentinian restaurant I despised.

The pink Kate Spade sandals I only wore once but then they broke.

My blue and orange Kate Spade sandals I only wore twice but then they broke.

The $500 guitar I didn't need and never played.

The Etro shirts that no longer fit me.

The Pringle of Scotland jacket that no longer fits me.

The $100 dinners I spent at random restaurants.

Dresses. Dozens and dozens of dresses. No longer fit.

The Nintendo DS I only played twice before getting bored.

The Betsey Johnson handbags I haven't even used yet.

One word: wine.

And those are just a handful of my regrets. This blog isn't big enough to list them all.

I fervently wish I could go back in time and take back all those purchases.

I need a car. I need a new laptop. I need rent money.

And now I don't have anything.

But I don't want to end this blog post on a sad note.

There are a few extravagant purchases I wouldn't exchange for anything in the world.

Such as:

The Jimmy Choo heels and sandals I got on sale.

The Prada skirt that matches perfectly with my crimson cashmere sweater.

The Betsey Johnson sun dresses (buy one, get one free).

The Louis Vuitton bag I use every day.

The $100 dinners at the French and Italian restaurants I adored.

The Morrissey concert tickets.

The Chanel perfumes lining my vanity.

One word: champagne.

So my life isn't a total regret fest. Just a partial one...

I guess my only words of advice are no matter how much money you are making, don't forget to save. You never know when you'll need the money.

Some purchases just aren't worth it.

I'm going to go cry now.

58 comments:

  1. I feel you honey! Last year I had a full-time job, a jalopy that still worked (so no car or insurance payments) and some grace period before grad school loans came into the picture. Sure, there was the rent, but I kept $5 in savings and would spend whatever I had leftover from bills (my checking was continuously replenished). Then my job went part-time and I had to save on that pay check, defer some loans (which really sucks!!) and of course, it was now time to get a new car...I haven't bought any new clothes in ages and it's harder to afford healthy food now too :(

    On a happy ending, you are not alone and you got some good purchases and good meals. Things will improve, somehow, someway!!!!! :) xoxo

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  2. I think it's part of growing up :P xx

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  3. Oh no, don't be sad, we've all been there at some point in our lives, but not everyone realises there's a problem until it's way too late.
    You had fun spending at the time but no more. Stick all those impulse purchases on eBay and start saving the proceeds.
    At least you've got some fabulous investment purchases you'll get pleasure from in years in come.
    Vix
    xxx

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  4. I am very good with money. I indulge but I also save. So sorry to hear of your story re. shopaholic. Am sure you'll get back on track. Good luck on finding
    a suitable job. Happy weekend, sweetie;-)

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  5. Oh, I hear you loud and clear. I too, have shopaholic tendancies. But I recently got my wings clipped. BIG TIME. I've been like this most of my life. And yet both my parents were very good with cash. The generation I suppose...they lived through the Great Depression. I never really learned not to live paycheque to paycheque. But I'm trying. Life was a lot of fun in my 20's, but I paid for it. Literally.
    Good luck with finding a job, with getting the shopping under control (but don't forget to enjoy what you have)and for learning to save. Hopefully we can both accomplish that.
    Miss you!

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  6. HUGE HUGS! I'll try to learn a lesson and save as much as I can :)

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  7. Love this post... I can relate. I too have a lot of hits and misses but I consider the misses my learning experiences... definitely not to be repeated.

    Have a great weekend Jen! xoxo

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  8. Ebay!! Sell that shit on Ebay or take it to second-hand thrift stores...you'll get SOMETHING back!

    During my slim times, I sell my clothes. It sucks, but hey, it's better than selling myself.

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  9. Totally feel your pain. I actually did worse things with my money (including buying a boyfriend a $25,000 Harley) and now I am out of money as well.

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  10. Aww jen! At least you'll be more carefully and critical about your purchases in the future!

    Merci beaucoup for stopping by darling, it’s so much appreciated =]

    Je suis désolée for the late reply!

    Stay safe and chic ma chérie,
    English Rose x
    http://iamanenglishrose.blogspot.com

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  11. oh lady. I am so sorry. I don't want you to ever live with regret though. I think this was all part of a learning experience and you are not alone. This happens to so many people. You live and you learn and now you can move forward and make different choices for yourself with your money. Maybe you could sell some of the things you really don't use...like the guitar maybe? Give it some thought :) Hope you are having a nice weekend!

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  12. Ahhh, I think I'm going down this path. I'm living at home and have no responsibilities, so I literally am wasting my money on worthless purchases!

    At least you got a lot of really good purchases as well.

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  13. Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. I definitely have shopaholic tendencies but do try to keep them in check. Hopefully things turn around for you soon -- on the bright side, you can sell the unfortunate purchases (that are still in one piece!) to consignment stores. I highly recommend saving that money!
    xo Josie
    http://winksmilestyle.blogspot.com

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  14. Love this post, darling!
    I am a shopaholic too!!!

    xoxox,
    CC

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  15. Oh yes, I have experience the regret list myself.... I have oodles of handbags I haven't used yet either. And no guitar but lots of vintage items everywhere and no where to them.
    I commiserate....
    Marie @ Lemondrop ViNtAge

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  16. Your message and prayers helped me through a very rough patch, Jennifer ... thank you so much!

    I miss you and your blog! I'm almost sorry to say this, Jennifer; but you always make me laugh AND cry ... I think we are in the same sinking boat nowadays! HELP!

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  17. This happened to me to,still does.Of course I don't spend thousands of dollars because I never earned that much and thank God I am not obsessed with designer clothing.I had a lot of part time jobs during college and all the money went on clothes since I had no bills to pay,no worries.I could have saved the money for other useful things but I couldn't help it.Reading your post helps me realize that things are getting out of hand and I need to take measures before it gets out of hand.So,don't be sad,it happens to all of us and the most important thing is to be supportive of each other and share our stories.

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  18. hi
    how are you

    i feel same like you here

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  19. You're right, it's always good to save

    -The Trendy Fashionista
    http://thetrendyfashionista.blogspot.com

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  20. I noticed quite a few bloggers setting up shops to get rid of perfectly good but not usable for them items. Whether you do that or try to sell some stuff on eBay not only will you get something back but you'll get rid of all those things that keep weighing you down with regret!
    But the pricy dinner that sucked? Ugh, I HATE that!

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  21. I'm not so good with my money either. When I used to get allowence, all of it would be spent right after I got it, and most of the time I couldn't even remember what I bought. I hope you get a job soon and start saving up your money. Keep your head up high girlie. :)

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  22. I love this post. For so many reasons. Oh I have been there. I know so many of us get paid and then 3 days latter go "where the F did it go?!"

    You know, with all those fabulous purchases you aren't using, you should starts a "Shop I Know, Right?"

    Could help!

    Amber
    ambersmouthwash

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  23. aw my dear! i feel for u i def have a bit of an addiction. Why dont you try selling some of the items you regret buying? I am thinking of trying this idea on ebay.x

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  24. Oh gosh, I LOVE this post. I totally did this too- I got some money from my Grandma passing and I squandered it away on clothes when I was in college. To this day, it is something I will always regret. You totally just said what I feel- love it. Hopefully, we learn from our mistakes!

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  25. Oh no...being unemployed also, it makes me sick to think of all the money I spent on stupid unnecessary things. But, I guess you live and you learn! That's what I keep saying to myself.haha:)SarahD

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  26. Sell the items you don't need. Stay strong and positive, good things will come soon honey.

    xo, Sophia

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  27. So I saw your blog. I wanted to invite you to follow my blog. I developed the idea for "Featured Followers by Elle © " where I promote all my followers. Check out my blog @ www.edkdolce.blogspot.com
    *Elle

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  28. I can totally relate sweetie, I think every girl can :) But don't be sad, just don't make the same mistake twice.

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  29. hahaha, you crack me up.

    and i agree shopaholic is a really thing and it's tough to crack. i wonder where in the hell all the money i made during college went!? and i made a lot of freaking money... it's tough learning to save. i am 26 and i am just now starting to understand how... and even still there's a great pair of stella mccartney sandals that are trying to lure me in!!!

    http://laurenlanzaosias.blogspot.com/

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  30. shopping make us blind,, ahahha
    just enjoy it,, keep smiling dear :)

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  31. Aw, well at least the good purchases sort of balance it out :) I know what you mean though, I have so many things I bought but never really wore or used yet.

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  32. I totally understand what you mean. I'm too broke now to be a shopaholic. I was definitely one in the past. There are many purchases I made that I now regret.

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  33. Aw well at least youre admitting it! always the first and best step =)

    p.s I am eating baby food at the moment and currently thought of you haha

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  34. we all buy things we shouldnt but at least you got some good buys like the LV!

    Missy
    Blending Style, Beauty and Fashion
    http://thefashionfusion.blogspot.com

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  35. I hear you! I'm really trying to save, but it gets to be a huge challenge. I wish you much luck!
    Btw, thank you so much for the sweet comment ; )
    www.poolovesboo.blogspot.com

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  36. Awww! I understand hon and I'm sure so do the other girls!! I have the tendency to slip too! Currently, I've busted my credit card and am only paying the minimun amount. I don't have a job and am looking for one. So things aren't all that great but then I have the will and motivation so I'll work on it and I thikn that's more important. The world's out there to support you know, but it;s us who will ultimately have to do it! :)

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  37. It's so hard to try to save when you just have $ at your disposal...I did this too when I lived at home. And you should've gone back to Kate Spade and returned those 2 shoes- that is unacceptable!!!!

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  38. You are so right, saving money is extremely important. I went through a time in my life as well that I definitely wish I could go back and not spend all the money! It was before I knew I was moving to Italy and that I would need every penny! We must go through these things in order to teach us valuable lessons. It is good that we are learning while we are young and before we make a really enormous purchase that we might regret. Chin up girl, you are wiser now for sure!

    xoxo
    Rachel

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  39. Girl, it's the tale of every shopper! Why don't you sell the regrets? I think you could make some mula off of them! xoxo

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  40. Oh, I know exactly how you feel. I've done that way too many times and regretted making the purchases and needed the money and felt totally screwed! Maybe you could try selling some of the stuff on e-bay?

    Good luck!
    Valerie

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  41. Awww!! I know what you mean...I am starting to do in that direction. I have my first real job and I'm still living at home so I don't have any bills...I'm just saving up for a car (and possibly a trip to london)...I need to learn to control myself.
    http://aclosetfashionista.blogspot.com/

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  42. Take some guitar classes to create beautiful music with that guitar :) I feel you on some of the purchases, but never fear. Now that you're wiser, these purchases will be less frequent and will be for the things you want!

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  43. Oh I hope things get better. Perhaps you can sell some stuff on eBay and recover some money. Hope all our comments and support make you feel better. We've all been thru' some form of what you're going through.

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  44. Darling, it's ok to spend. You earn it, you enjoy it. But I feel you - sometimes we look around our rooms and think, wow do I need/care about all this?

    I cut down a lot on purchases since I was in grad school and am still looking for a new job. My husband makes a decent living, but I don't want money to be why I should go on a spending spree. Regardless of whether it's $50 or $500 look at the item and decide whether it's a timeless piece in your closet/home. I think it's really helped me. I'm still super tempted by sales but am trying to keep/buy things that will last for a while.

    You do have some pretty insanely awesome items so you've already got a great closet of course! Can you eBay/donate what you don't like? Perhaps the guitar can be sold/given to a school or family member wanting to learn?

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  45. This is really such an insightful post. It really puts everything into perspective. I really need to do a similar exercise and write out all the stuff I buy and either don't like or never wear.

    Thank you for sharing,
    Marcie

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  46. I entirely understand where you're coming from--I've been there, usually when I was less than satisfied with my life at that particular time. The only thing I can say for myself is that I was at least utilitarian--I may have purchased things that weren't put to use right away, but things I did eventually use later.

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  47. We all make regretful decisions. The best part about mankind is our ability to learn from our mistakes!

    clothed much, a modest fashion blog

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  48. Oh sweetie I hear ya. I can't seem to be saving any form of real money lately. Why are things so damn expensive?? But I'm glad you don't regret it all. I don't think I'm going to be ever buying anything Kate Spade from what you just said!! I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you that you get some luck with the job department & just feel better. I want an apartment so badly but realisticly I can't afford it for a while. A long while. Some of us are in the same boat, so your not alone dear. Not at all.

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  49. Ah, I'm definitely not buying any Kate Spade shoes after reading this post, LoL! But yea, I'm a fellow shopaholic, and I definitely understand how you feel, regretting old purchases that now sit in my closet, unloved - but that's what ebay is for! You should list some things you no longer wear, then you'll feel less guilty! :)

    -Ashley
    http://breakfastatsaks.blogspot.com

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  50. I'm so sorry for all of the purchases you regret. It can be hard to resist buying new things, I know. Have you considered selling any of the items you no longer wear? It might not be worth much, but some money is better than no money.
    And at least you did get some amazing purchases out of it. It's better to splurge or something you know you're going to get a lot of use out of.
    I do hope things get better for you. Think positive. Everything will be okay.

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  51. aw, hope you feel better! sending you a hug.

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  52. thanks for your sweet comment, i'm glad you like x

    Missy
    Blending Style, Beauty and Fashion
    http://thefashionfusion.blogspot.com

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  53. I'm right there with you. The monthly mortgage bill is always met with feelings of regret over some of my recent purhcases.

    But hey, sometimes we need to buy ourselves a little something...especially the nice dinners and wine :-).

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  54. I can't begin to tell you how I can totally relate to this post. I missed you and your post Jen. Glad to be back! :)

    xx,
    betz
    http://herarmoire.blogspot.com

    PS: My friend and I started a new blog about NYC. There's so much more about this city beyond Carrie Bradshaw's Manolos. You might wanna visit it our blog (and feel free to follow!) :)
    http://everythingnewyorkcity.blogspot.com/

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  55. What an honest and thought provoking post! you know, I need to be better about saving, I actually just got a raise and I still find myself complaining, thanks for reminding me just how grateful and thankful I should be. I know you will find a great job for you! I too have things I know I shouldn't spend money on...but then I also have those those things I love. But I guess that is all that they are, things. You have people who love you and that's where it is, xoxo.

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  56. just found your blog and it's darling! love this post-i also have spent so much money on pointless things, but also so much on things that make me happy every day! so enjoy those, and consider those priceless!

    http://asequindressatbreakfast.wordpress.com

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