Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Back from Denver!

I'm baaaack!!!

I know a lot of you have had sleepless nights, wondering about my trip, so I thought I would quickly put you out of your misery and provide a detailed account.


Friday

The flight to Denver, Colorado was the rockiest and most nauseating ride of my life. It was like being on the worst part of the roller coaster, where you’re pretty sure you’re going to throw up as soon as the ride ends. For the record: I didn’t throw up but wish I had. Yes, the flight was that bad.


(waterfall at our hotel)

As soon as we got to the hotel, my dad decided he needed to eat dinner immediately. Like, he was going to turn into a pumpkin if he didn’t digest food before 7 p.m. So we spent 30 minutes walking around, searching for an acceptable place to eat. I saw lots of fantastic places. A Whole Foods. A fancy Indian restaurant. A pizza parlor. Panda Express. In the end, my parents decided that the best place to eat would be a shady-looking Mexican joint nestled in an abandoned shopping mall.

That night, I polished off almost two bottles of Merlot before passing out in the living room of the hotel suite. I mysteriously woke up in bed. (Thanks, mom!)


(my bed)


Saturday

My parents and I spent the entire morning at the King Tut exhibit at the Denver Art Museum. Although the exhibit has been in Denver for months, it was still incredibly packed. You literally had to wait in line for five-to-ten minutes to catch a glimpse of each artifact. I found it very distressing and tiresome.


(Outside the Denver Art Museum)

We then spent that afternoon looking at all the other regular art exhibits in the museum. My parents made the mistake, however, of showing me the kids area where you could create your own Monet or Picasso postcard. I spent two hours in the play area perfecting two postcards with stencils, paints, and glitter. My parents were pissed and they bitched at me for taking so long. I ended up ripping up my postcards and running away from the kids area in tears. It was a very emotional day.


(capitol building)


(Streets of Denver)


(man playing piano outside)

Later that evening, we walked around downtown. I quickly realized Denver has an overabundance of two things: hipsters and bums.

That night, we hit up the hotel bar. After I ordered a round of whiskey sours, the good-looking bartender shyly told me, "I think you're really pretty." My dad piped up, "she'd be even prettier if she lost 30 pounds." Horrified, I spent the next two hours drinking myself into oblivion. I don't remember the rest of the night.


Sunday

When I was a little girl, my dad told me how devout Hindus in India would travel hundreds of miles to bathe themselves in the holy water of the Ganges River.

I never imagined that one day I would have a similar experience, but fate intervened.

You see, my parents and I made our own pilgrimage...to the very first Chipotle ever built.

If you have read my blog long enough, you know that I have an addiction.

I could not believe I was standing in the location where greatness was created 17 years ago. And there were people walking into the place and ordering food, like eating at the first Chipotle ever built was a normal experience. It was mind-boggling.


(the mother ship)

I ordered two tacos, chips & salsa, and soup (yes, SOUP). I even got pictures of the staff. They were so thrilled I made the pilgrimage, they gave my entire family free t-shirts.


(The actual staff at the first Chipotle location)

(Sidenote: I am the most awesome dork EVER).

Later that afternoon, we visited the Unsinkable Molly Brown Museum (where the Titanic survivor lived) and learned a lot of really cool facts about the history of Denver.


(Fountain in downtown Denver)

Then I was unwillingly dragged around town for TWO HOURS by my parents as they looked for a restaurant to eat dinner. Seriously. I just don't understand why finding a restaurant is such a big ordeal. We ended up eating sandwiches at a coffee shop. Yes. Two hours of searching and we end up with that shit.


(Streets of Denver)


Monday

My dad got us to the airport three hours early that morning, much to my annoyance. I spent the entire morning reading The Girl Who Played with Fire (sequel to Dragon Tattoo and so far, sooooo amazingly good).

Once we boarded the plane, a really creepy older man in his fifties told me I was "more than welcome" to sit on his lap. I declined, for personal reasons, and then explained it was probably against airplane regulations. He then got serious and said he wanted me to sit next to him, which made the situation even more uncomfortable. In sheer panic, I ended up sitting next to a young mother with a newborn baby. Fortunately, the baby was the quiet the entire trip.

When I got home, I realized how many chores I had to do in the next week and my headed started swimming. Ten minutes upon arrival, I decided I needed another vacation.

The End


(Me looking ecstatically happy in Denver)

If you actually read that entire post, you get the "A" Award! There is no physical prize, it just means there is a girl out there named Jennifer Fabulous who thinks you are AWESOME. That's better than any gold trophy or monetary reward, trust me.

48 comments:

  1. Reminds me why I'd rather kill myself than travel with my folks. I really don't think it would be good for me to meet your dad. Like. Really. Not.

    I laughed through almost all of this. "The mother ship", fucking HILARIOUS!! I so love you!

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  2. Dude you were so clllloooossee to me! If only I had known!

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  3. Traveling with the parents... Always a bit of an adventure, right? It does sound like a good time for the most part, though!
    xo Josie
    http://winksmilestyle.blogspot.com

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  4. This is the best travelogue ever written! I love Chipotle too and so did Ozzie Osbourne he would go into the store and order like 5 burritos (and I don't think he shared)! Hence Sharon made sure he hit the treadmill. Loved the closing shot of you!

    ~Bonnie

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  5. Back from Denver indeed. This is a hilarious travel story... travelling with the family... Am giggling as I read this!

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  6. Ahaaa the mothership! ugh i'm so jealous :) I live in London so we don't have Chipotle ANYWHERE near me! don't think there's any in Europe!

    Monica xx

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  7. I may be awesome but my life is clearly devoid of any true meaning as I have never had the Chipotle experience. Now I kinda feel dead inside. :-(

    Hilarious post, great last photo. Hell, in your place I would have polished off two bottles of Merlot too!

    http://idlefascination.blogspot.com/

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  8. Ha! the mother ship!!

    I love your bed. And, there is something so awesome about you getting buzzed with your parents. Love it.

    Amber
    ambersmouthwash

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  9. PS: Please fax me some Chipotle. F'real.

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  10. BAHHAHA " the mothership" LOL hilarious!!!

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  11. i hate rocky flights ! but it looks like you had a great time ! totally worth all the nausea.

    xx lue

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  12. Ooo, what a fun trip. My dad's done exactly the same thing your one did about getting food the first night.

    The Denver Art Museum looks really cool.

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  13. You have made me laugh! Brilliant writing and how embarrasing is your Dad? xxx

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  14. First Chipotle ever - nice! Sorry for the downs in the trip. I bet the postcards were beautiful!

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  15. I did actually read your post from beginning to end! I didn't know whether to laugh or be very very upset! I canNOT believe what your dad said to that bartender... I think dads think they're being funny and don't realise how much things hurt (?!)

    Glad you had an ... er... 'interesting' vacation :P

    Leia

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  16. cool. what a very awesome trip.. especially since parents are around. :D i miss that with my parents, since they're old and all. they prefer being in one place. haha

    thyaudaciousness.blogspot.com/

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  17. welcome back! great pics!

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  18. Hahaha, I love your adventures. So much.

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  19. Hi gorgeous!
    Sounds like some fab sight-seeing! Yay for museums and Chipotle!
    Love your photos :)

    xoxox,
    CC

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  20. YAY! You think I'm awesome. Lol.
    & yes, you are the most awesome dork EVER! [Us Dorks have to stick together!]
    I really can't believe your Dad said that about you having to lose 30 pounds. Ah, the wonders of alcohol...
    You know I have never eaten at Chipotle? I apparently have to try it in the near future!
    That doesn't sound like such a good vacation, I'm sorry you were so fustrated. *hugs*
    Your next vacation will be awesome though! :D

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  21. oh don't look so sad. :) loved that you polished off an entire bottle of merlot. go jen!

    http://ohtobeamuse.com

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  22. Such a cute funny post!!! I would love to go to Colorado. Lovely pictures xxx

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  23. chipotle is the absolute best!

    xoxo
    maxwell conrad

    www.fledglingblog.blogspot.com

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  24. Sounds like a wonderful experience. Traveling. These are lovely photos you've used, Jennifer. Made me enjoyed more reading the entire post.

    btw, I'm glad you didn't have to sit beside that old man. eww!

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  25. Welcome, welcome back, my love! I'm kind of obsessed with the streets of Denver - they look so colorful yet quaint at thevery same time.

    Thank you, thank you, thank you for your comment on my post yesterday. You seriously made my day/week/month/year! I am so glad that you are going to read the books I mentioned; and I seriously wish that we lived closer to each other because we would totes be fast BFF's!! :)

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  26. Your parents are so cool, looks like you had a great time in Denver. I would love to see your Picasso postcard, I would have spent hours doing that too.
    What a weird old man,he must have creeped you out, did he think he was Santa or something?

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  27. nice photos ^^ i love the waterfall photo ^^

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  28. This is a very interesting post because I had been wondering how your trip was going so its good to find out about it. I enjoyed reading it all and I love the way you wrote it. There are some really lovely pictures here too. I like your story about the kids area because if I had been there, I probably would have been making the postcards too, how fun! I heard about your experience with the mother and baby on the plane on facebook the other day. I know how you feel about needing another vacation just after you finished one. Thats how I felt a few weeks ago too.

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  29. Yaaay...I get the A Award...hahahaa!

    Ah, memories of vacationing with my parents and drinking lots to cope with that fact! Sorry your dad made that comment to the bartender...parents can be so cruel...I don't know why. Even sorrier to hear about the creepier guy on the plane...yikes!

    Sounds like a good trip though. I can understand you mindstate at the museum...when I travel, I'm usually in and out of the museums and then quickly looking for a place to eat or shop...hahaha!

    I loved the photos, it's good to have you back!

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  30. great pics & blog ♥
    like to follow eachother?

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  31. I really have been wondering about your trip!!!!! Seriously!

    I love this post. It looks like you had a great job. I really love the especially happy photo at the end!

    :)

    ~Zabrinah

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  32. The Girl Who Plays wiht Fire is the BEST of the triology (at least in my opinion). You are going to love it (if you didn't already finish it)!

    Love your travel story and I love Chipotle. I got so excited because we finally got on by my house...yippee!

    xoxo
    Amy

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  33. brilliant post! made me laugh, too.
    love the photos.

    www.wardrobexperience.blogspot.com

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  34. Well it sounds like you had quite a hectic trip. And I have to admit I'm a tad jealous of your chipotle pilgrimage - I'm getting close to addiction territory myself! Their salsa is just so good.

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  35. Looks like a great trip...minus the flight and the search for a place to eat dinner ;)

    I love Chipotle! I would have been so excited to see the first one built!

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  36. I read the whole post! Does that mean you will come visit me in Omaha? That would be a awesome prize!

    Love you Jenny Benny; glad you had another fabulous trip with Ashoka making every situation as painful as possible (in true Ashoka fashion). Lol!

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  37. Very cool photos, such beautiful art around Denver!

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  38. yay, hipstamatic iphone app!!! sounds like you had quite the time! and your dad has no idea what he is talking about! you are smoking hot, as is!!!!!! for reals.

    http://laurenlanzaosias.blogspot.com
    i'm back...

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  39. Wow, sounds like traveling with your parents is a huge ordeal instead of a relaxing vacation. At least you got to see some cool places! Unfortunately I have never had the pleasure of eating a Chipotle meal... Now I feel obliged to eat there.

    xo, Sophia

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  40. Awee, Thank you!! that was really kind of you :D!

    www.apieceofcrapdepartment.blogspot.com

    best regards from Sweden
    /MALIN

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  41. omg your bed!!!!! its glorious! what a fuun time great post=)


    x
    http://www.sweeetjanee.blogspot.com/
    http://www.sweeetjanee.blogspot.com/
    http://www.sweeetjanee.blogspot.com/

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  42. love reading your travelog! well, parents can be hard to travel with :)

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