Journalist. Mother. Bunny enthusiast. Pop culture junkie.

Journalist. Mother. Bunny enthusiast. Pop culture junkie.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Tweets from a 14-year-old Me

There are a lot of annoying teenagers on twitter. Have you noticed? It makes me grateful that I never had social media when I was that young. I can't even imagine all the embarrassing crap I would say. Cuz that shit stays on the internetz forever.

Sometimes, I often wonder what it would have been like if Twitter had existed when I was a kid.

So, I decided to share with you my tweets from 1998.


Jennifer Fabulous @jenniferb02
Just walked into homeroom and discovered @mikesoccer101 is in it! He has gotten SO much cuter since eighth grade. :)
#happiestdayofmylife #highschoolisgonnarock

Jennifer Fabulous @jenniferb02
I wish my parents would let me have my own phone line. It sucks talking to my bff @smrosecat and having my dad say "hello? hello?" into the receiver during a very serious discussion about Dawson's Creek.

Touchstone Pictures @touchestone
Want to meet rising star Heath Ledger? Enter for your chance to win VIP tickets to the NYC premiere of 10 Things I Hate About You!
-Retweeted by Jennifer Fabulous

Jennifer Fabulous @jenniferb02
Mr. Hendricks gave us a THREE PAGE essay to write and he wants it due in two weeks. Who does he think we are, seniors? Grrrr. #highschoolsucksballs

Jennifer Fabulous @jenniferb02
For those of you who didn't show up to my birthday party, I just wanna say there are no hard feelings, but please don't speak to me ever again. Kthanx.

Jennifer Fabulous @jenniferb02
There's some whiny white girl singing in a Catholic school uniform on @MTV right now. Huh.
#whoisBrittanySpears #stayawayfromTaylorHanson

Jennifer Fabulous @jenniferb02
Got called out in world history for staring at @mikesoccer101 instead of paying attention to the stupid Nixon documentary. I hate Mrs. Charles!!!

Jennifer Fabulous @jenniferb02
So went to the Homecoming dance and saw @mikesoccer101 making out with that dumb ass cheerleader from my biology class. #shootmenow

Jennifer Fabulous @jenniferb02
While walking to lunch I bumped into @mikesoccer101 at his locker and dropped my books. He said "Sorry, Jessica." OMG!! He knows my name starts with a "J"!!!!

Teen People @teenpeoplemag
Cover girl Jennifer Love Hewitt spills her beauty secrets! Check out the new issue on stands now!
-Retweeted by Jennifer Fabulous

Jennifer Fabulous @jenniferb02
Ummm some girl in my P.E. class just found out she's pregnant. How weird is that? I didn't even know 15-year-olds could get pregnant! LOL!!

Jennifer Fabulous @jenniferb02
@smrosecat Did you record Buffy last night?

Jennifer Fabulous @jenniferb02
Holy hell. Just watched @abc11 news and learned some kid shot up his school in Colorado! That is so scary! :(


French Girl in Seattle said...

Hilarious! I would have followed you on Twitter, that's for sure (even though at this point I am not quite sure how to use the damn thing!) PS: After your last comment on my blog, I have made it my mission in life to introduce you to French culture. Stop by tomorrow morning if you are interested in French desserts (duh...) :-) Veronique (French Girl in Seattle)

Oh to Be a Muse said...

I totally love these fake tweets, and the fake RTs as well. I would have been on Twitter talking about Buffy too. LOL at the 10 Things I Hate About You/Love-Hewitt stuff.

Magali Vaz said...

This is a riot! I must admit I'm really surprised that in high school you didn't know about pregnancy, I knew about that when I was 12 or so (probably comes from having a nurse for a mother).
But otherwise my 13 year old tweets would have been very embarrassing, too full of hormones & angst.

Ashley/ MILK TEETHS said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ashley/ MILK TEETHS said...

haha ommgg these all made me laugh out loud especially the 3 page essay one. TOTALLY remember thinking writing an essay more than a page was insane and terrible. Don't get me started when we had to include sources and use MLA formatting-gah!

creativefashionglee said...

This is so hilariously funny! Made me smile. :)

Mr kane said...

Great tweets! What a laugh!

Mr J.Kane

Audrey Allure said...

Haha, loved the one about "he knows my name starts with a J!" So true though - glad I didn't have Twitter when I was younger!

Tanvi said...

You are so witty and innovative Jenny! lol It would have been fun to twitter in high school.

∞ © ∞

s said...

awe you're so cute and so funny! the cutest and funniest tweets ever!!! <3

Josie said...

Your own phone line. Brilliant. I die.
xo Josie

Imogen said...

This is the best post because I found it very relevant. I have so often thought about how different it would have been if twitter and social media existed when I was in school. I remember it wasn't until my last year of high school which was 5 years ago now that I first got into facebook or anything really. I notice how Ryan's younger sisters use social media and I always think of all the different stuff I was doing at their age. I loved reading your tweets because mine would have been very similar I think.

Mouthwash said...

These are so perfect!! "Stay away from Taylor Hanson" BWAHAHAHA

Sherin said...

I'm so glad I never had social media as a teen either: they would've been similar. I died laughing at 'OMG, he knows my name begins with a J!!'.

The Dainty Dolls House said...

That was brilliant...mine would have been quite similar :)) Columbine was horrible. Loved this...hope you are well doll! xx

Cafe Fashionista said...

The level on which I can relate to these tweets is seriously insane right now. I'm thinking we may have been the very same 14-year-old! :P

Shannon said...

You crack me up.

And no lie- I went around telling everyone that "that britney spears" chick is totally a one hit wonder.

Whoops. :)

Couture Carrie said...

These are awesome!
Lol at the Dawson's Creek ref.!


Amy said...

haha, very entertaining!

David Macaulay said...

teenagers are blah - I taught them for a while. This is clever but I thought myself originally thinking - really I didn't think Twitter was around then (doh)

Bravoe Runway said...

So when I read these 'tweets' I had to wonder how old you are because Brittany, Dawson's Creek are def from years when I was in high school. You look super young which is a good thing, and yes I'd prob have tweeted the same thing :)

Anonymous said...

"While walking to lunch I bumped into @mikesoccer101 at his locker and dropped my books. He said "Sorry, Jessica." OMG!! He knows my name starts with a "J"!!!!
#soinlove " Is my favorite! This is hilarious, lol.

Kim (A Very Sweet Blog) said...

I am LOVING the birthday one! HAHAHA That is definitely something I would say. Oh, I'm so glad there wasn't Twitter when I was growing up. HAHAHA Sweet Jen! Sweet!

Arielle-HumblePieVintage said...

I actually found my old Xanga the other day from when I was 14 years old. It was crazy to read the things I said.

Love this post, so funny!

Blogger said...

Quantum Binary Signals

Professional trading signals delivered to your mobile phone daily.

Start following our signals NOW and gain up to 270% per day.