Journalist. Mother. Bunny enthusiast. Pop culture junkie.

Journalist. Mother. Bunny enthusiast. Pop culture junkie.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

My Leo fantasies, revealed.

The other day, I told you about a friend of mine who had an unhealthy obsession with Jonathan Taylor Thomas.

Well, today, I'm going to tell you about my teenage love for Leonardo DiCaprio.

In 1997, Leo was a raging heartthrob. For some of you younger readers, who only know the creepy, slightly stocky Leonardo from today, I know this is hard to believe. But trust me, the guy was a stone-cold fox.

I couldn't even watch my worn-out VHS of Romeo + Juliet without heaving a heavy sigh of love.

When I was in eighth grade, I would have extremely vivid fantasies involving Leonardo.

I would be sitting in math class, and then all of the sudden Leo would appear, wearing a loose button down white cotton shirt and snug, slightly faded blue jeans.

"Come away with me, now," he would demand, staring intensely at me with his striking blue eyes.

Flustered, I would look around.

"But I'm in math class right now," I would protest.

"I don't care," he would say, dramatically, sweeping me off my feet. "I'm in love with you!"

The envy I envisioned on my female classmates' faces was always priceless.

And with one tilt of my head, we would kiss, right in front of my entire math class.

And then I would repeat this fantasy in history class, gym, and sometimes randomly at the grocery store.

These fantasies consumed me. I was feverishly in love. If I saw a tabloid that would even suggest Leo had a girlfriend, I would then fantasize about stuffing carrots up her nose and smearing peanut butter in her hair. And then Leo and I would share a hearty laugh over my jealous fit and skip off into the sunset, hand in hand.

The difference between me and Candy, however, is that I never told anyone about my fantasies.

In fact, I kept my passion for Leo hidden, out of shame.

If one of my friends even brought him up, I would jump out of my skin and stutter, "What Leo-who-I mean, what, of course I know who he is, but ew so not my type, I mean god, please." And then I would turn beet red and change the subject to the latest Spice Girls song or something.

But it finally got to the point where I couldn't keep my love a secret anymore.

Titanic came out in theaters.

I saw it on opening day with my parents.

After we exited the theater, I started uncontrollably sobbing.

My dad was surprised.

"Are you crying because it was a sad movie?" he asked, perplexed.

"No," I sobbed back. "I'm crying because Leonardo DiCaprio doesn't know who I am!"

And there it was.


French Girl in Seattle said...

Awesome story, Jenny! I am older than you are, and, I, too, have loved Leo for a long time. What girl did not fall in love with him in Titanic? He has been very smart in managing in career after that movie, and following a three year hiatus, has returned with strong roles, in excellent movies, proving that he was not "just eye candy," after all. A favorite movie of mine is "What's Eating Gilbert Grape." A young Leo. A young Johnny Depp. Both excellent. You can't go wrong there. Veronique (French Girl in Seattle) PS: Awesome shots you chose here! I can see why you would fantasize about Leo in math class...

PAPS said...

We all had our share of fantasies one time or the other.

Vix said...

What a great read! I've admired Leo as an actor since What's Eating Gilbert Grape but never taken much notice of his looks until I saw The Departed, he's definitely improved with age. x

Tamara Nicole said...

Ha! I totally loved him and JTT, so funny! The joys of a young crush:)

Sherin said...

I miss Leo from the 90's. He was amazing. I was so in love. But did the same thing where I would pretend I didn't know who he was.

Asta said...

hehe..i actually like him more now than before..i always thought he looked a little girly for a man..but now, he has proved to be a good actor(not just pretty face) and he looks macho man. :-)

Tanvi said...

I completely share the same sentiments as Asta! :)

∞ © ∞

Anonymous said...

Man, you're right. Leo used to be such a hottie. I also went through a Leo phase 7th/8th grade. It all started with the Basketball Diaries. I thought that movie sucked, but Leo was so hot! And then Romeo and Juliet came out and I just couldn't contain my love for him. So I hung his picture up in my locker. He doesn't look like the Leo I was in love with anymore!!! But I don't blame him, no one looks the same forever. Great post!

Mabel Time

Alexandria said...

Goddamn I love Leo. Like, still love him. Even with his questionable string of girls (they're questionable because they're not me). Love. Him.

Couture Carrie said...

Awwwwww you are such a sweetheart!


Shannon said...

My husband lost his virginity while watching Titanic.

Therefore, I do not like Leo.

Makes perfect sense, right? :)

Mimi said...

oh my gosh, i love the last part of this post!!! ;)

i think it's safe to say that everyone had a crush on leo at one point or another. ;)

<3, Mimi
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Barry said...

I'm always interested in hearing your fantasies Jen.

...was that out loud?

JUST ME said...

I saw that movie 4 times and SOBBED each and every time.

Obviously I'm going to back to relive my awkward teen years in 3D

Josie said...

Real life, who DIDN'T love him?
xo Josie

Tara said...

Titanis is one of a god movie with Leonardo as the main cast, i love that movie, nice post :)

The Dainty Dolls House said...

My younger sister was obsessed with him. I had to take her to see Titanic over ten times. I stood in line at midnight to buy it when it came out on dvd too. I hung all her posters up - which she had over a thousand. I haven't liked him mich since that!! x

Cafe Fashionista said...

That final quote is priceless! It is amazing how easily we can get caught up in celebrity crushes when we're young. :P

LINDA said...

Cool post!

Linda from

Kim (A Very Sweet Blog) said...

HAHA Jennifer! You are too funny girl. His eyes always got me. I still love Leo. I like him for his acting skills. He's amazing. Thanks for sharing this.

Rachel Jensen {Da Paura ♥} said...

Oh yes Leo was gorgeous!! I definitely crushed on him. But once I saw Legend of the Fall and A River Runs Through it, Brad had officially stolen my heart... ;)


Oh to Be a Muse said...

i totally understand your teen crush on Leo. everyone i knew had a crush on him in 8th grade, except for me. he just wasn't my type. but i would pick him over JTT any day!

I actually like older Leo better...he's more rugged and less...soft. :)

Tights Lover said...

He the best actor around right now. I refuse to even argue with anyone about this...even if he is 'creepy' hahaha.

I'm sure a lot of people shared your love for him back then as well...

But, uh...carrots and peanut butter? Remind me to NEVER get on your bad side...

Arielle-HumblePieVintage said...

*sigh* Leo

Meri said...

there was a time when surely he was the most beautiful human in existence. I'm going to have a short moment for leonardo's romeo... le sigh...

sherene said...

Oh my ur post really cracks me up, what a sense of humor,u get there. I looooveee it :))

Anonymous said...

leo is real beautiful
i´m portuguese , i love your blog.

Jaime @ La vie...J'aime said...

i adorrrrre him. cannot wait to see titanic in 3d lol

Ocean Dreams said...

Ha ha I loved this because I used to be like that too - except with my novel characters ha ha ha. I loved Leo though as well and loved it especially when I turned 13 the year that Titanic came out - totally went and bought this Leo mag and still have it. He's certainly hot today too.

Amazing Quotes said...

Very amazing and interesting post

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