For the past couple of weeks, I've been waking up with a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach. A feeling so unusual, it really did take me a long time to figure it out. The feeling is hope.
No matter how many bad things happen to me, I can't keep wallowing in misery like I've been doing the past two years. In order to create a positive change, I need to make it happen myself.
I want 2011 to be about ME. While I don't have a job, I want to use this time bettering myself. Making myself more beautiful on the inside and out. Educating myself on things I have always wanted to learn, but never had time.
I want to be content with life.
I want to have fun without consequences.
I want to feel free and careless.
I want to be a stronger person.
I don't think I'm asking for much. And if I make an effort, I don't think my results will be hard to come by.
I don't know where this feeling of optimism came from. It magically appeared this year. Maybe I'm just sick of being overcome with misery.
But I do think happiness is on my horizon.
God, I really hope I don't look back on this post next year and cry.