I have the misfortune of being a subscriber to US Weekly's daily newsletter.
And I have the misfortune of being too lazy to unsubscribe.
So, my breaking news in the mornings comes in the form of shameless celebrity gossip.
Lately everyone has been gabbing about the separation of Jenny from the Block and her mousy husband, Marc Anthony.
And as an US Weekly subscriber, I get to learn the entire story, whether I like it or not!
Marc cheated with a flight attendant. Marc wanted J.Lo to dress demurely. Marc eats babies for breakfast.
I've heard it all.
Now on Facebook there are dumbasses taking this split way too seriously and there have been "teams" formed. Some people are on Team Marc ("J.Lo cheated on HIM!") and Team Jennifer ("Marc is a MONSTER!").
Well, I don't like to be left out of hot debates, so I decided to join in the fun with my own team:
That's right, bitches.
Before Marc Anthony married the other half of Bennifer, he was married to former Miss Universe, Dayanara Torres.
He, in fact, left Dayanara for the spoiled pop star in 2004.
Here is her story.
This Puerto Rican beauty's life began as a fairytale.
When she was 17, Dayanara was walking down a street of her hometown when she was invited to participate in the Miss Puerto Rico pageant.
She not only ended up winning the entire competition, but at 18, she went on to win the Miss Universe crown.
She went from rags to riches overnight.
After winning, she became a huge movie star in the Philippines and in Puerto Rico.
She also started to dedicate her life to helping others. She became an ambassador for UNICEF. She created the Dayanara Torres Foundation, which provides scholarships to poor students in Puerto Rico and the Philippines. She also writes books.
In 2000, Dayanara married the love of her life (or so she thought), Marc Anthony. The couple have two sons together.
It was a rocky marriage because of Marc's exhaustive infidelity.
The last straw was when he started to have an affair with Jennifer Lopez only a year after he and Dayanara had renewed their vows.
The couple divorced in 2004.
According to their divorce settlement, Dayanara is prohibited from speaking ill of Marc Anthony in public. If she does, she could be fined $10,000.
But even if the ban had not been put into place, it would not matter. Dayanara has too much grace to speak disparagingly of her ex-husband. She admitted that she was absolutely heartbroken when he left her for another woman. She has admitted that the pain was so agonizing and intense, it felt like it would never go away. But she does not hate him. Their marriage simply did not work out.
Fortunately, Dayanara's life seems to be getting back on track. She obviously has discovered that she could do a lot better in the guy department.
And she knows that making the world a better place is a lot more admirable than being famous for shitting out generic pop songs.
Who's having the last laugh now?