When I was a little girl, I poured through my mother's Vogue and Elle magazines, memorizing every detail of every fashion editorial. I would make up stories for each editorial, complete with names and personalities for the models. It was like playing with Barbies.
That shit would keep me entertained for hours.
Well, I haven't grown up much.
Here is a fashion fairytale. Enjoy.
Once upon a time...
There were two best friends. The brunette was named Hope and the blonde was named Sunny.
They did everything together, especially shopping!
Sunny always brought her little doggy!
Hope took photos! Yay!
Aren't they having so much fun?
Sunny enjoyed learning new things and being sociable. She wanted to have a million friends!
She also enjoyed looking in the mirror a lot and admiring her looks.
Hope was a waitress in a really cool diner. She loved her job!
She didn't care much about her looks or her social life anymore, because she was so wrapped up in her steady boyfriend.
But people are never who they seem.
Insecure about her looks, Sunny sought the attention of every guy who was nice to her. There was not a douchebag or sleazeball in sight who didn't have her phone number. She texted them all!
Hope was a judgemental bitch who thought she was always right. She was a spoiled princess from a wealthy family and expected everyone to bow down to her. And she totally didn't approve of Sunny's outlandish behavior.
That made Sunny mad.
So she snapped her fingers and had one of her henchmen strangle Hope! Oh no!
After the deed was done, Sunny panicked. She didn't want to go to jail. She was too pretty for jail! So, in order to dispose of the body, she chopped Hope up into tiny little pieces. She put her into a food processor and added milk, chocolate, and ice. She turned Hope into a milkshake!
Sunny drank Hope when she thought no one was watching.
But what she didn't know is that Hope always got the last word.
Hope had suspected Sunny was going to kill her. So, she had actually sipped poison before Sunny's henchman had found her!
By eating Hope, Sunny had ingested the poison as well!
Sunny's lifeless body was found by her henchman. He had always been in love with her, despite her wild ways. He was devastated.
Well, I hope you're having a better week than Hope and Sunny!
Marry, Fuck, Kill...Birthday Party Crew
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